Tag Archives: balance

When It’s Time To Stop Trying So Hard

If we want our relationships, our work, our art, our life experience to be amazing, we will need to learn to let go of trying to “do” it right and learn how to have more fun.   There are best practices for everything, from social media, promoting ourselves, growing our business, even our spiritual practice.  There’s always someone to help us get caught up in doing it better, right, doing whatever it is more correctly, more successfully.  It’s all good, but take a minute and breathe.

I believe, from personal experience, that everything, from any particular area of our spiritual growth through our work, relationships, art, everyday experiences, will all flourish and bloom in releasing our need to control or force things into place just so.

When we’re in alignment with our purpose, we’re truly following our heart, we’ll be successful, however success shows up for us on our path.

pexels-photo-258330We can cultivate a wonderful balance in life of work and play.  Many have mastered work equals play.  And, this works great until we think we need more knowledge, to be more perfect, in order to be more successful, or we run into a challenge.

 

This week my challenge is my beautiful SaraDoolittle.com website photos are cut off on a PC.   I’ve now spent hours trying to crop them, trying different aspect ratios, moving the focal point around, trying other photos, emailing my website’s customer service (they’re very nice), and spending hours on user experience with my husband on his PC laptop and me on my MAC laptop.   Ugh.  This was not fun, at all.  Frustrating and time-consuming.

So what to do when it all starts to feel less than fun and more like a grueling task and my mood goes to hell in a hand basket?   I take breaks.

 

Yesterday we walked away from house projects and website projects.  We went to our favorite baked potato restaurant, visited a couple of art galleries, took a photo to be framed, and enjoyed a farmer’s market.  It can be just a few minutes or several hours, whatever it is will assist us more than pushing through a challenge.  Why?  When we have fun, loosen up, we allow for the best ideas and solutions to come to us.

So I pay attention to how I feel when I’m in task/work mode except for when I don’t 🙂   When I do walk my talk, I ask myself how I feel.  How is my level of energy?  It doesn’t have to be OMG this is SO AMAAAAZINGGGG EXCITING kind of energy, but rather just a feeling of hey, I’m enjoying this.  I love what I’m doing right now.  Or, just I’m in the zone, this feels nice.

It’s good to know how to practice self-kindness and assist ourselves and enjoy being more.  I’m still practicing this.  As an ex-“uber-doer”, it’s so worth it to practice this balance.

Gardening and the art of slowing down

The other day I drove home in the middle of the day with garden supplies and noticed two deer meandering on our property.  They were in no hurry and seemed pretty content.  And then I felt contentment, though I did wonder if they just munched a little on our redbud sapling.  When they heard my car come down the dirt road one looked back at me and hung out while I experienced him or her.  Moments like that make me want to shout how much I love living here.

My husband and I bought this home in 2015.  I love the huge windows, the skylights, the woods, the deer, the birds, the fox, the moon and the stars (I know you can find them anywhere), and the wind chimes I placed next to the bench I sit on.  Not so much the Copperheads but so far we haven’t seen one yet this spring.  I’m so grateful and especially for our back yard garden area project.  You know that expression “it’s about the journey”?   Well, for me that’s so true, and it’s this house and our garden area that reminds me to just enjoy every day and not worry so much about getting things done or doing more.

woods

Working in the garden, adding more shade plants, tending to what we have, is a big enough adventure for me right now.  And I get to step back and see how it all looks and how lush it’s becoming.  Actually our property behind the house needs a bit of work to match our vision for a shade garden, but we’re in no hurry.  We’ll buy more new plantings in the fall, with the exception of planting some ground cover in the next couple of weeks, before it turns blistering hot here.

The more I work outside in our yard, the more I realize that being in a hurry and busy is not path to happiness for me.  Deadlines, other’s expectations, social events, networking, even travel which I usually love, just doesn’t do it for me right now.  I need breaks and lots of them and gardening, painting, writing, feel good to me right now.  When I relax I enjoy.  The tricky part is creating a balance between creating my ideas around my work, and time for me to just sit still.  There will be a time when I’ll want to do more, just not at this time.  When I start to feel like I should be further along in with bringing my ideas to action, or utter the words “I should be…by now”, that’s a clue to switch gears and chill.  Unexpectedly, the best opportunities show up when we create a good balance between doing and being.  Maybe things will take a little longer but I’m a big believer in everything happens at the right time, in the right way anyway.