Category Archives: positivity

Habits That Create The Best Possibilities (for me)

Here are some things I practice to be aware of.  We all have our own ways to be at our best and attract our best possibilities and these may or may not work for you.  It’s whatever supports you and empowers you.  For me, with so many experiences that I’m having just about every day now, it’s helpful to remember and practice whatever feels right at the time.  It’s pretty ordinary yet offering a beautiful shift in my day.

  • Practicing self-kindness by doing all the things I enjoy every day such as yoga and meditation, making time for exercise, and time for art.IMG_1843I’m not at my best when I let these things slide and, at this writing, some of these have been sliding off the scale. So off I go to walk on my favorite nature trail.
  • Watching my self-talk and turning it around when it goes south
  • Being my real-deal self.  You’re great too, but I don’t want to be you.
  • Remember that it’s nearly impossible to make a difference by playing it safe, or be a people pleaser.
  • Build a small community of support and let the unsupportive relationships fade
  • Allow others to assist me and remember to ask how I can assist them
  • Cultivate lightheartedness no matter what.  Lightheartedness brings opportunities.
  • Notice when I play smaller because of fear, insecurity, or some other lower emotion.  Remember it’s not the truth, and get back to being my magnificent self.
  • Gratefulness for pretty much everything
  • Being good with sometimes feeling uncomfortably stretched, and therefore vulnerable, and standing out for unusual ideas.  It’s a game…wonder what I’ll do today that will be a stretch for me?  But this is not to be confused with pushing ahead on something that’s not in my best interest.
  • Use my imagination and imagine me already doing that which I want to do and the opportunities show up to assist me.
  • Take a stand for the seemingly impossible possibilities
  • Create incremental changes and look back once in a while just to appreciate how far I’ve come
  • Enjoy a relationship with my awesomely mind-blowing amazing guidance that’s always there within me, always encouraging, supporting, assisting, loving me
  • Be both uncomfortably stretched and happy at the same time.  See those feelings that seem to be at odds, as success.
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Thank you to all artists everywhere

I’m inspired today by doing one of my favorite things…visiting art exhibits.  This afternoon we went to a flower show and four local galleries.  Now I feel greater than great.  What would we do without art?  Without your creativity and unique way of looking at something?  And the very cool thing is we all interpret the art we see, hear, or feel, so differently.  Through your art I’m in my highest emotions and in amazement at your talent.  Thanks for putting yourself out there and sharing your humanity.  I love you!    I really do hope imitation is the best form of flattery.  No worries, there’s no way I can do what you do, I can only do what I do…but you sure do inspire me.

Here’s to you continuing to inspire everyone who experiences your work.

pexels-photo-30161

TMI

When I share with people that I give talks, I also share that I’m nervous about public speaking.  Totally TMI right?  However, even Adele tells people she’s scared when she sings to crowds, sometimes she tells the crowds just before she begins another song.  “I love you but you really really scare me”, is what I remember she said.

But I’m not Adele.  Publicly saying I’m nervous, especially while delivering my 30-second elevator speech, isn’t a winning strategy for attracting people to hire me.  You’d never know, at one time, I used to work in advertising.  Note to self:  must self-promote better.

I have other fears…like Copperhead snakes.  Yikes, they are a bad ass snake.  They don’t slither away from us, they hunker down, appearing to be a confident and secure snake…a good role model for the rest of their peeps.   Because we have a lot of them on our property, I wear my gardening boots to prevent a nasty problem.  Eazy peazy right?   But…being seen by ooodles of people?   Not so eazy peazy.  Sometimes I’m not as bad ass as I’d like to be.  microphoneEveryone knows that many people are nervous about public speaking.  That doesn’t help me!  And that very unhelpful factoid doesn’t mean that particular fear isn’t something for me to look at.  For me, it’s about how I feel about myself.   That I am not enough and I’m afraid you’ll see that too Way more challenging than dealing with Copperheads. 

But over the years, I worked on I’m not enough.  I learned to be more aware of what I was thinking about myself and the words I chose.  Over the years, I released many negative beliefs about myself, replacing them with way healthier ones.  But never skipping the valuable, but sometimes highly uncomfortable step, of looking inside of me to understand where all that came from, how it started, and why I kept believing it.  The more I understood, the more I let go of one limiting belief at a time.  If I do say so, the result was totally worth it.

If this fear is showing up again at this time, it’s because I’m stepping up to bigger opportunities and allowing more of me to be seen.  However, the art of looking and releasing is way easier and faster now, because I know to always look inside of me and to learn from that place.  Throughout the remainder of my life, I plan on acting on many of my dreams.  And if I’m not good enough shows up again?…  I keep looking until those beliefs completely disappear.

I Know More Than Squat Now

I didn’t know squat before about managing my awareness, my energy, or about how I was creating (usually creating what I didn’t want to experience).  There was me controlling things by making them happen because I could….Miss Organized.  And there was the philosophy of things just happen.  Life happens.  Well I feel totally differently now as experienced by everything I’m learning.  I’m learning to use my intuition rather than take a velvet hammer to my life and pound it into it’s organized place.  I’m learning to catch myself before I go down the various rabbit holes of discouragement.  Then there’s creating.  Had zero knowledge that I create what I experience from my thoughts and habits, among other things.

There are ideas I’m creating and working on, there are interesting people I’m meeting, and my every moments, large and small, are lovely.  I can’t wait to walk down the hall to my office every morning to get to work on some of my ideas.  What’s funny is I’m waaaayyy more open and lighthearted.  I’m effusive but hopefully not annoyingly so.  If I really like a business I’m dealing with I send them an email and tell them all the things I like about them and thank them profusely.  Then I wonder if it might not be a good time to ground myself.  I wrote two thank you notes two times last week and wasn’t the least bit embarrassed for myself.  One of the “gushees” even sent me a nice extra discount for future use.  More reason to gush.

My feeling is that lightheartedness is contagious.  img_9122Yesterday I watched my husband walk over to the paint person at Lowes and told her how nicely stocked the paint can aisles looked and asked her if she did it.  Ok random example he might wish I didn’t share, but point being, she lit up with a big smile. Yesterday I went to a vegan class at Whole Foods (yes friends my face will get even thinner…again…bite me…this time I’m sticking with it) and a woman asked me you probably get this all the time, has anyone told you that you look like Jill Biden?  Happily I said, only one other person. THANK YOU, I LOVE Jill Biden and then I added and Joe, and Michelle and Barack.   And then I thanked her for not telling me I looked like Steffy Graff as the checkout person at Safeway told me.  Steffy is awesome I just don’t think I look like her.  You’re looking at my photo aren’t you and thinking I don’t think she looks like Jill Biden.  Whatever.  I don’t think I look like Jill either but how nice of the woman to say so.

I have no idea where I’m going with this other to say that I believe the world shifts one tiny moment at a time.  When we feel nice we behave nicely.  I’m personally experiencing joy and inspiration as a result of what I choose to focus on, where I place my thoughts.  I know way more than squat now and I’m enormously benefiting from it.

Equisite Life Lessons

Exquisite  aha moments are frequent these days.  Maybe not so exquisite as obvious.

I’ve been so confused lately about friendships.  It appears I’m in a transition period and, as a result, I feel I have some decisions to make about some of my friendships.  So much has shifted in my life over the past few years that my friendships are shifting as well.  With the country going through so many raw emotions now it’s easy to get into the habit of being upset, feeling hopeless, and seeing the negative.  But those are not emotions I want to cultivate.  I get it, something very upsetting happens and we go to fear, seeing the worst in everything, feeling dread and waiting for the worst to happen.  However, my belief is that feeling hopeless and angry offers the world or me nothing of benefit, it offers only struggle.  Instead, I choose to see possibilities.  I choose to literally create what I desire.  As I’m creating positive, I’m experiencing more positive things in my life.  And, when I look back, I see a direct correlation between when I began to choose to look to myself to create better thoughts, healthier habits, and when positive experiences began to show up for me.  So I’m not budging because this is working really, really, well for me.

However well things are going for me, I do feel a bit lonely hanging out here in positivity land as I don’t exactly fit in with some of my friends any longer.  I’m having a really hard time listening to them.  However nice it is to get together with people, I don’t enjoy being with friends that prefer to go to fear and dread.  And, it’s impossible to create what I want to create if I surround myself with people who have fear and dread.  It’s like trying to create a healthy lifestyle while smoking a pack of cigarettes.

When a friend and I recently spent time together, I wanted to enjoy our time by talking about anything but how bad things are.  I realized I’d been watering myself down in this friendship.  I rarely share what I’m excited about, or talk about some of the things I’m doing.  I don’t tell and the friend doesn’t ask.  So explaining why I don’t want to look at all that’s seemingly dark out there, I shared why I now choose to see possibilities, hope, and inspiration.  I brought her up to date by sharing some of the amazing things that I’ve experienced, how hard I worked to get here, what I had to look at to get to this place, how excited I am about what I’m working on now.  That I’m not interested in focusing on the drama and popular events that pull us down into hopelessness and fear.  Unfortunately, I not so subtly conveyed through my evident frustration that day, and this is how I feel about all your negativity.

I can’t speak for my friend, but this was not about how often we get together but more about the authenticity and quality of our time together.  It’s about letting friends see all of me now, especially the parts I’m apt to hide because I think a friend won’t like those parts.  It’s about being seen and then asking if the mutual interest isn’t there, why are we?  It’s a lesson in letting go.  Being a better and kinder friend might mean allowing some friendships to fade away for our mutual benefit.

We’re the big picture

Not too long after I started this blog I wrote a post titled No News Is Good News.  Until recently, I successfully let go of a long-standing habit of being wrapped up in the news.  I had let it inform my disposition, thoughts, beliefs, and my emotions.  Letting it disappear from my day allowed me more opportunities for hope and inspiration.  Family news, news about musicians coming to my town, friend’s news, inspiring news… that’s the news I choose to keep in my life.  But for a few weeks I’ve been ramping up my time watching all things election.  Before I knew it, a minute here or there became watching part of a news show, then an entire news show, a debate and watching the election “experts” post-show summaries.  Last night after hearing endless reasons why the person I already know I don’t want elected to office, should not be elected to office, I was done.  Watching and commenting on someone’s bad behavior is just as appalling as the bad behavior being discussed.  Calling anyone names, even calling the name caller a name, isn’t helping.  I don’t need to listen to endless reasons not to vote for who I don’t want to vote for.  How much poop does anyone really need to know?  Just vote.  Don’t trash.  Don’t run down someone.  Just vote.  But don’t expect miracles.  Let’s look at the bigger picture.  Doesn’t big change and miracles get created by each of us?  Last night as I walked away from the talking heads running down various characters, I said over my shoulder to the nice person I left on the couch, that to me, the bigger picture is who we are.   How do we want to conduct ourselves?  How do we want to feel?  If we practice living from a higher perspective won’t most of the issues covered by the news disappear?  That’s my belief.  Given the current election, and it may seem cavalier to ask this, but will electing a President of our country solve what we’re truly looking to experience for ourselves?  And not just for our country but for our world?  All of mankind?  As far as I can tell, if we want to experience a huge shift in our neighborhood or the world, it’s up to each of us.  There’s no religious deity (living or dead), no candidate or person in power, no guru…that can take us where we’re capable of going.  We’re creating what is and what could be.  It’s us.