Monthly Archives: January 2017

Gracefulness, air, and water

Graceful is this week’s WordPress Photo Challenge.  My examples of how air, water, and gracefulness interact.

Balloon festival in Colorado.

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The “bad sail” as we like to call it.  We love it.  It increases our speed when the wind is behind us at just the right angle.  It’s graceful and quiet except for when it snaps-to as it fills with air.  It teaches infinite patience because just as we go through the gazillion steps to rig it, the wind changes to another angle, and we have to take it down and go back to the other sail…hence the “bad sail”.

On Way to Pickering Creek

A catboat, Selina II, that takes tourists out for short excursions in St. Michael’s MD.  We usually see her in daytime but one night, while we anchored out, we saw her gracefully sailing at dusk.  I think catboats are always graceful…and super cool sailboats.

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The Antonio Jorge’s gracefulness on water.  In Provincetown Massachusetts, as she returned to port was a lovely sight to be seen.  Our whale watching plans were cancelled due to weather so I ended up having a killer seafood chowda (that’s how you say it) and we were treated to a sight of the Antonio Jorge.  Sometimes the best things happen when from a change in plans.

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My window to feelings

Foggy mornings create an aesthetic of peace for me.  Lifting my head up off the pillow this morning I saw one of my many favorite scenes outside.  Happily announcing, “Oh it’s foggy today.  I think I’ll get up now”… knowing where the best spot would be.

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In my special little office I perched myself on top of my stool and watched the fog sitting heavily between the trees.  Nothing much happened except for me exhaling and the morning light becoming brighter. This was not to be missed.

Invitation to enjoy

I just received my formal Invitation.  For a while now, I’ve had an ongoing informal invitation for joy.  Sometimes I show up for it but then I get lazy and go back to serious, analytical mode…What’s down the road?  What will the end result look like?  How do I get there?  Am I doing enough?  Am I enough?  Will I make a difference? 

Jeez, I don’t have to take my freaking “journey” so seriously.  It’s not just about doing what I love to do, because that’s the easier part. The greater challenge for me is, what frame of mind am I in when I’m doing what I love.

Yesterday my doctor calls and tells me I have to go back for another test because they see something.  I have two ways to deal with this and both made an appearance….1-Bad word.   Just when my life is totally kick-ass I’m going to die.  OR, 2-It’s probably nothing they’re just being extra buttoned up which is great, that’s their job. I’m going to approach this with a light heart and trust it’s all going to be fine.  And I went with #2 and gratefully it ended with…”you’re good, come back in six months just to be sure”.

The possibility of having something truly serious and truly challenging in my life got my attention.  It wouldn’t have been the same old worries and internal dialog that usually consume my thoughts.  Whatever the outcome today or going forward will be, the situation appeared as an invitation to show up in my own life differently.  Sea Ocean Sand Beach Vacation Coast Chill Bare ConceptIt’s such a good time to accept this invitation because I’m ready to start creating some exciting things and what better time to enjoy myself.  I’m hearing “accept and enjoy every invitation…there’s one every second”. 

Life isn’t a marathon – Observe a child

It’s an honor to be in the presence of a child.  Children have the most free spirits and unbridled joy.  They can swing to tears in a mere second, but in the next moment they’ve moved on.  They put their happiness out there, totally enjoy the moment and don’t care how their happiness pours out of them.  They skip, jump, and say really cute stuff.  I notice they don’t self-edit. If a child wrote this blog post, the post might say something like…had fun yesterday!, went bowling, ate fun food, spent time with my Aunt and Uncle, bowled, held my Aunt’s hand, did I tell you I went bowling?, colored on my place mat, I really like to bowl.  

I’m taking my cues from kids.  There’s no class, workshop, book or leader that can teach happiness as well as a child can. hands-touching I’ve been running a Marathon to be at ease, be myself, cultivate joy, and create what I came here to create.  But there’s an undercurrent of seriousness I’m trying to shake off because it’s not helping.  It’s all good.  Whatever, right?!

So here’s my blog post for today…Yesterday was a really great day, I went bowling with family, wore my STRIKE bowling socks that AOL gave me during one of our many team building events…before they laid me off, the socks and I came in last but I had lots of fun anyway, we went to a restaurant that looked like a beach hut, I ordered tater tots and soup, borrowed a crayon and colored a little on the place mat next to me, held my great nephew’s hand, I’m in awe of him and his brother, drove home, wanted to go to an art gallery reception but instead wrote a (serious) blog post on friendship, really wish I’d gone to the art gallery reception, I love meeting artists, so I’m going to the next art gallery reception no matter what, woke up early today and I’m writing this blog post, going to go out for lunch for a crepe even though it’s not gluten free and sit on the city dock and look at the water and eat my crepe, take photographs, go for a walk, and maybe paint, maybe fill out the lawyer’s form to do our will, really hope I paint instead of filling out the form, put the date for the next art gallery reception on my calendar, did I tell you I love art galleries?!

Equisite Life Lessons

Exquisite  aha moments are frequent these days.  Maybe not so exquisite as obvious.

I’ve been so confused lately about friendships.  It appears I’m in a transition period and, as a result, I feel I have some decisions to make about some of my friendships.  So much has shifted in my life over the past few years that my friendships are shifting as well.  With the country going through so many raw emotions now it’s easy to get into the habit of being upset, feeling hopeless, and seeing the negative.  But those are not emotions I want to cultivate.  I get it, something very upsetting happens and we go to fear, seeing the worst in everything, feeling dread and waiting for the worst to happen.  However, my belief is that feeling hopeless and angry offers the world or me nothing of benefit, it offers only struggle.  Instead, I choose to see possibilities.  I choose to literally create what I desire.  As I’m creating positive, I’m experiencing more positive things in my life.  And, when I look back, I see a direct correlation between when I began to choose to look to myself to create better thoughts, healthier habits, and when positive experiences began to show up for me.  So I’m not budging because this is working really, really, well for me.

However well things are going for me, I do feel a bit lonely hanging out here in positivity land as I don’t exactly fit in with some of my friends any longer.  I’m having a really hard time listening to them.  However nice it is to get together with people, I don’t enjoy being with friends that prefer to go to fear and dread.  And, it’s impossible to create what I want to create if I surround myself with people who have fear and dread.  It’s like trying to create a healthy lifestyle while smoking a pack of cigarettes.

When a friend and I recently spent time together, I wanted to enjoy our time by talking about anything but how bad things are.  I realized I’d been watering myself down in this friendship.  I rarely share what I’m excited about, or talk about some of the things I’m doing.  I don’t tell and the friend doesn’t ask.  So explaining why I don’t want to look at all that’s seemingly dark out there, I shared why I now choose to see possibilities, hope, and inspiration.  I brought her up to date by sharing some of the amazing things that I’ve experienced, how hard I worked to get here, what I had to look at to get to this place, how excited I am about what I’m working on now.  That I’m not interested in focusing on the drama and popular events that pull us down into hopelessness and fear.  Unfortunately, I not so subtly conveyed through my evident frustration that day, and this is how I feel about all your negativity.

I can’t speak for my friend, but this was not about how often we get together but more about the authenticity and quality of our time together.  It’s about letting friends see all of me now, especially the parts I’m apt to hide because I think a friend won’t like those parts.  It’s about being seen and then asking if the mutual interest isn’t there, why are we?  It’s a lesson in letting go.  Being a better and kinder friend might mean allowing some friendships to fade away for our mutual benefit.